Cultural Do's and Don'ts Japan | Solo Travel Talk

I always like to prepare before a trip to understand a culture before I visit a new country.

To be frank, I was not sure what to expect before my recent trip to Japan. What I found was a friendly, conscientious, and traditional culture in Japan with a lot to be admired. On this episode of my solo travel podcast, I share what I learned about Japan from the perspective of a solo traveler.

You can find a written summary of my podcast below. If you would rather listen to this episode click on the player above, or find us on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, Spotify, or your favorite podcast app.

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There are many facets to Japanese culture, as well as many do’s and dont’s. Here are my top takeaways:

Food Etiquette | The Don’ts

1. Don’t commit chopstick faux pas

Bottomline: You will be eating with chopsticks every meal, so it behooves you to know what you’re doing.

Do not cross the chopsticks. That’s bad luck. Lay them together on the chopsticks rest pointing left. If you don’t have a chopstick rest, put them in the paper sleeve at the top of you plate pointing left.

Do not stick your chopsticks upright. This is one of the worst things you can do with chopsticks! You might think while you’re eating your bowl of rice “Well these things keep falling down, I’ll just stick them in the rice,” not realizing that this is, to the Japanese, super bad luck. Not to mention, it makes a reference to death as it resembles the incense sticks used at funerals. Trust me, don’t stab your chopsticks in your food.

Don’t point with the chopsticks. It sounds goofy, but you might accidentally do this if the chopstick is in your hand and you’re talking with your hands, but this is very offensive to the Japanese. Don’t point, okay?

Don’t lick the chopsticks. Just don’t do it.

2. Don’t Burp.

In some cultures, burping is not bad. It’s viewed as an indication that you enjoyed your meal. Well, the Japanese are highly offended by any passing of bodily gas. You'll find when you go into a bathroom, they have these fabulous toilets with all these different buttons. One of the buttons on many of the toilets is an artificial flushing sound, which they use this if they have a stomach issue that, you know, they need to take care of ... there's some noise to disguise the deed. Some even have music!

3. Don’t walk and eat.

Food is to be savored in Japan, so there is no eating on the run. You might see somebody from a street vendor getting something, but they typically stand there and eat what they have.

4. Do not pour soy sauce directly on your food.

This is a big no in Japan because they don't believe in putting several different types of food on one plate and mixing the flavors. Because of this philosophy, your food will usually be served on multiple smaller plates. Think bento box. So, like eveything else, soy sauce has it’s place. Put it in a little bowl and dip. If you just dump it over, they might think you are ruining the meal. The chef might come over and, without embarrassing you, have a discussion with you about the meal.

5. Don't ask for a to-go/ doggy bag.

This is simply not a normal request in Japan. They don’t even really have anything like doggy bags.

6. Don't eat everything on your plate or drink everything in your glass.

This is a very weird thing to me. The Japanese feel like if you do this, you might still be hungry and they didn't really satisfy you. It also might be look upon as a little gluttonous. Just leave a little sip/bite left on your plate.

7. Don’t drink too much saki.

Saki can go down very smooth, but boy, it has a punch. You don’t want to find yourself drunk all of a sudden. Especially as a solo traveler. So take it slow!

8. Don’t tip.

Tipping is considered rude and demeaning. They feel like good service is part of the meal and it is not necessary to give the server a tip as a thank you. They’re well paid, and they take pride in their work. The service and presentation of the food is a major part of a meal in Japan. So do not tip.

Food Etiquette | The Do’s

1. Do slurp your noodles.

Unlike burping, slurping is a compliment to the chef and shows you are having great pleasure in eating a particular dish. But only slurp your noodles, okay! Nothing else. Don’t slurp your drink, especially not through a straw. There’s an art to it, its a little quirky and funny.

2. Do pour drinks for others, but not yourself.

This is an interesting one that is simple part of Japanese culture. Japanese don't poor their own liquor drinks or even water themselves. They either have the server or somebody else at the table do this. It is just proper etiquette. If you are with others, wait until everyone has arrived at the table before you start drinking. It;s basically like saying cheers.

3. Do compliment the chef or server before and after your meal.

The proper way to do this is by placing your hands in your lap and saying “itadakimasu” (ee-ta-dah-key-mas) which loosely translates to “I will recieve.” Then after you finish say, “gochisosama deshita” (go-chee-so-sama de-shi-ta)” which means “It was a feast.” If you can’t remember this, give some kind of indication that you are appreciative of the meal both before you first bite and after your last.

4. Do lift small bowls or plates to eat.

This is how it’s done: Take the bowl of rice or a small plate in your left hand. Then in your right, eat with the chopsticks. It’s okay to put the bowl up close to your mouth. With soup, it’s okay to drink from the bowl but you must hold the bowl with two hands. That’s important. Finally, don’t lift a large plate.

5. Do eat sushi with your hands.

You can also eat sushi with chopsticks, but using your hands in this case is OK too. You will be given a little cloth to wipe your hands before every meal at almost every restaurant to ensure that your hands are clean.

6. Do practice saki etiquette.

When drinking from a saki cup, place one hand around the cup and one handoff the bottom and sip.

7. Do sit properly at a Japanese dining table.

You will encounter many of these short dining tables in Japan. Ladies sit with both legs to one side. If you are taking part in a tea ceremony, you can kneel.

8. Do try new things!

Food will be a key part of your trip to Japan. I’ll venture to say you will never have a bad meal. The Japanese are so into fresh, tasty, healthy, nutritious, good food that people who don't like that kind of food don't stay in business. Good ramen noodles are not expensive and they’re delicious. They have a whole street in Tokyo called Ramen Street which has nothing but dozens of ramen restaurants. Bottom line is try everything because this is very important to experiencing their culture in a deep way.

Behavioral Etiquette | The Don’ts

1. Don’t bother the Geisha or Maiko for a photo. (Unless they’re fake geisha!)

If you go to Kyoto, where most of the Geisha and Maiko live and perform, you might see one dashing very fast, from one building into the next. But they really don't interact with others, so don't go up to them and ask them to take a picture with you because it will be very off-putting. Now, with that said, if you see a lady or a young woman who's dressed like a Geisha or a Maiko, and they're just strolling down the street, they are not the real deal. However, they’ll be happy to take a photo with you for a small price. That’s ok to do. Just don’t mess with the real ones.

2. Don’t blow your nose in public.

It’s okay to sniffle, but Japan has a very quiet, mild mannered culture. If you have to blow your nose, go someplace private.

3. Don’t make eye contact.

In Western Countries, if you don't have direct eye contact, people start to think you’re shifty or untrustworthy. But when I was in Japan, I kept noticing people looking at my mouth or throat, and I found myself thinking, “Why aren't you looking at me?” But I had forgot about this particular aspect of Japanese culture.

4. Don’t touch anyone.

Unlike Italian or Spanish culture, the Japanese are not a hug and kiss culture. There really aren’t very many displays of affection. Really not even a handshake. If they extend their hand then it's okay. Mostly, as most people know, the Japanese bow when they greet or meet someone.

5. Don’t smoke while walking down the street.

Surprisingly, they have inhumer of designated places where people can smoke in Japan - even in some restaurants or upscale bars they have certain rooms where you can smoke.

6. Don’t jaywalk.

Just like in Singapore, it’s against the law, and Japanese follow the rules. Wait a crosswalk, and wait for the light.

7. Don’t open the door of a taxi.

If you hail a cab and it stops, don't open the doors. Most taxi cab doors open automatically, but if they don't, it is part of the driver's duty to get out and open the door for you. And when you arrive at your destination, wait for him to get out and open the door for you.

8. Don’t open gifts in front of the giver.

Also, receive the gift with two hands. It’s appropriate to take the gift back to your hotel or wherever, and then write a thank you note of some sort.

9. Be nice to the Nara deers.

This one is pretty specific, but if you happen to visit the ancient city of Nara, you might visit the nara deer park. They’re everywhere and they are not afraid of people, but be respectful. Don’t taunt them with food, and be careful as well. They could kick you, and you definitely don’t want that.

10. Don’t speak loudly or shout.

Japan has a very quiet society. So speaking loudly will make people uncomfortable, and may even lead them to think that you’re agitated or not quite all together.

11. Don’t take photos inside temples.

This is a sacred, spiritual place and it is considered disrespectful to take photos inside. Admittedly, I completely forgot about this rule on my first day in Japan. I was so overcome by this temple and it’s beauty that I just started, unthinkingly, snapping photos. Someone came up to me and said “No” and I was mortified that I had done that, but I never made this mistake again.

Behavior Etiquette | The Do’s

1. Do bow.

The general rule is if people that you come in contact with bow, you bow. Follow their lead and don't come up from the bow until they come up. The proper way to bow is to clasp your hands at the waist, and bend from the hips with a straight back.

2. Learn a few basic Japanese words.

Learn to say Hello: Konnichiwa (pronounced: kon-nee-chee-wah)

Goodbye: sayonara (pronounced: sa-yo-na-ra)

Yes: hai (pronounced: hi)

Thank you very much: Arigato gozaimasu

2. Be quiet on public transportation.

Whether you are on train, subway, bus or taxi, put your smartphone on silent. Japanese people do not like ringing smartphones or people talking on phones while on public transportation. If you must take a call, speak very softly. No loud music on devices or you will be reprimanded!

3. Wait in line.

The Japanese are the greatest line makers in the whole world. You will probably have to line up to enter trains, subways, buses, taxi stands, restaurants, and even toilets, but there is no braking, pushing, shoving or stressing. Everyone just calmly stands in line and waits their turn.

4. Think left.

Like the UK, Japan drives, walks, and stands on the left.

5. Use both hands to receive gifts, business cards, etc.

I mentioned this in the don’s but this is the proper way to receive in japan. With a business card, remember to look at the card, turn it over and hold onto it while you thank the person. Don’t just jam it into your purse, because this person is giving you something that is important to them.

6. Take off your shoes in temples and shrines.

If you see shelving and shoes, that's your clear sign to take yours off. Just look for those clues, and you’ll know what to do. Because of this rule, you should also always wear socks!

7. Follow the rituals of temples and shrines.

8. When exchanging money, place the money on a tray rather that directly into someones hand.

9. Dispose of your trash responsibly.

There are very few trash cans in Japan, so you will have to carry your trash with you until you find one.

10. Dress conservatively.

Avoid active wear unless you are exercising, hiking, etc. Avoid cleavage, but short shorts are okay for some reason. One thing to note is the Japanese are all about cute culture. So don’t be surprised when you see people wearing things with characters or colorful pom-poms, etc.

In summation: Being familiar with the cultural norms and the etiquette of a travel destination helps you experience your solo trip in a much more deep and meaningful way.

It helps you get through culture shock, which is something you might experience when you go really anywhere that is distinctly different from your home base. If you have an understanding of the local culture, you can be prepared to embrace the differences without being offended or offending someone else - even unknowingly. It prevents the danger of accidentally breaking the rule or even laws. Ignorance is not a defense! If you go to Singapore, you must know that it's against the law to chew gum. It's actually against the law to even have gum in your purse!

In addition, being culturally aware opens doors to new friendships. This really is so true because you'll connect more with others. There's just a much better rapport when you make an effort to respect someone else’s culture.